


Dear David, I-

by orphan_account



Category: Political RPF - UK 20th-21st c.
Genre: Epistolary
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-05
Updated: 2015-12-05
Packaged: 2018-05-04 17:51:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5343050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of excerpts from the fictitious volume <i>“Dear David, I…- and Other Unfinished Letters”</i> from this beautiful piece; http://lolitics-meme.livejournal.com/8600.html?thread=17351320.</p><p>The fictitious book was "published posthumously by Miliband's son Samuel, who edited his father's unpublished writings".</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dear David, I-

 

FOREWORD

by Samuel Miliband

 

Dad would not have approved of this publication. He was a private man as well as a good one and, I think, a great one. But in his profession, greatness is political, goodness is personal, and he was a better person than politician.

These letters are intended as a reflection not upon his politics but upon his personality, so often maligned during his time as Labour leader.

I submit them without further comment.

I would like, however, to thank my cousin Isaac, and his wife; the documents they unearthed were crucial, their editorial advice was incomparable, and I will always remember the kindness they showed during some of the bleakest days of my life.

I would like to thank my grandmother, Marion, who has a soul of steel and a mind sharper than mine will ever be. Her strength kept us all standing after Dad died.

And Mum. For everything.

 

* * *

 

 

_13th May 2010_

_Written on the back of a spending review from 2003, crumpled and smoothed out again later. I surmise it was to be left for my uncle, but was abandoned for reasons unknown._

David,  
  
I told you last night, but I think you'd fallen asleep. I'm standing too.

Know I said I'd stay until the weekend, but I'm going home. I miss Justine and Daniel.  
  
When they get back, give my love to Isaac, to Jacob and to L  
  


 

* * *

 

 

_16th May 2010_

_Written on official paper bearing the House of Commons logo. Found amongst his constituency paperwork from the time._

  
David,  
  
 ~~I know you're upset but you have to understand that it's not about~~

  
I am informed that you have expressed dissatisfaction with my decision to stand. Valuing your political opinion and ~~lo~~ friendship as I do, I regret it deeply.  
  
Nonetheless, our policies and visions for the party's future differ so substantially that

 

~~David plea~~

~~  
~~

 

* * *

 

_7th June 2010_

_Found scribbled on a piece of notepaper at the bottom of Dad's old briefcase._

  
Dear David,  
  
It was good to see you at the GMB hustings yesterday.  
  
You looked so thin, though, and I thought ~~  
~~

 

 

* * *

 

 

_8th June 2010_

_Handwritten. Found amongst the papers kindly given to me by Isaac Miliband last year. Interestingly, it is nonetheless clearly unfinished._   
_Isaac speculates that the note was never delivered but that Dad misplaced the paper, which was found my uncle, who retained it._

 

  
David,

Lunch after the NS hustings?

~~Or, if you didn't want, we can~~

~~I almost~~

~~I think you should know that when I speak and you look at me like~~  
  
Ah, David, I think my heart might be

 

 

* * *

 

 

_9th June 2010_

_Written on a scrap of paper. Ink somewhat smudged. Discovered amongst Dad's stuff by my brother Daniel._

  
David,  
  
If you're going to avoid me in private and ignore my calls you could at least stop the ostentatious public hugs and touching. I wouldn't ask– I'm sure the political capital is immense– but I'd like to think that I was more than just

 

 

* * *

 

 

_15th September 2010_

_On an untitled Word document amongst Dad's digital files._

 

David,  
  
I realise Crosland is your blind spot, emotionally speaking, but shouting 'he died' at Paxman seemed a bit

I just think that maybe   
  
Are you

 

 

* * *

 

 

_16th September 2010_

_Another Word document, entitled 'Re: Question Time'._

 

David,  
  
I'm afraid Google defines a declaration as 'a formal or explicit announcement', and although I would like nothing more than  
  
God, I'm sorry, I meant this to be light and charming but I'm so tired and all I can think of is

Well at any rate _I_ meant it and always did and I still do and

 

 

* * *

 

  
_25th September 2010_

_Found under Dad's pillow, the night he died._

 

  
Dear David, I

 

 

* * *

 

 

_26th September 2010_

_In an evidently badly shaking hand._

 

David if yesterday was the last time you'll ever

No, sorry, what I mean is that I need to

 

 

* * *

 

 

_26th September 2010_

_On the back of David Miliband's notes for his speech to Conference, given to me by Isaac._

 

Your speech was great and I am truly

 

 

* * *

 

 

_26th September 2010_

_It is unclear whether or not the following note is unfinished, whether it reached its intended recipient, and even who the intended recipient was. I have my own theories, of course, and have included it here for completion._

  
  
From time to time I think that I would give anything

 

 

* * *

 

 

_28th September 2010_

 

_An unfinished email, printed, edited and partially crossed out, and retained for reasons unknown._

_The corroborating email sent to David Miliband's office, which he kindly produced for me, contained only the first two paragraphs, and a cordially expressed desire to meet subsequent to the birth of his child._

I'm sorry that you feel that way, David, but I do of course accept your refusal to serve in the Shadow Cabinet.

If you should ever change your mind I would be delighted to put your formidable abilities to their best use. I know that you will remain loyal to the party. We are lucky to have you.

~~And of course I understand why but I think it unfair that the party has to suffer as well.~~

~~The nightmares are back and~~

Yours,

Ed Miliband

Leader of the Labour Party

 

 

* * *

 

 

_8th November 2010_

_Written in a more legible hand than typical of Dad, folded inside a newspaper article announcing my birth._

 

David, David, he's just been born and he's gorgeous.

Already I think he looks a little like you and I wonder sometimes

 

 

* * *

 

 

_24th December, 2010_

_Inside a hand-made card childishly depicting two sheep. Never signed or sent, for reasons unknown. Recipient unspecified, presumed David Miliband._

 

Ah, you can't imagine how I

And I saw you on the television last Tuesday and you looked good like you always do in December, but thinner, and I worry because I haven't forgotten how last time

Justine misses you, by the way. So does Daniel.

It’s strange, this is all so strange, but you can't imagine how much I

 

 

* * *

 

 

_25th December, 2010_

_A Christmas card._

 

Dear David, Louise, Isaac and Jacob

 

Merry Christmas!

 

Love Justine, Ed, Daniel and Sam

 

 

* * *

 

 

_27th May 2011_

_Jotted down on the back of a blank wedding invitation. Recipient unknown._

Thanks for coming. I like the new suit, you looked amazing. I hope it was

 

Anyway today was wonderful and beautiful and you looked so happy that I felt like you don't care anymore and I hope it's true because almost more than anything I've wanted you to stop looking so

 

* * *

 

 

_24th March 2013_

_Drafted on the back of a letter from his brother concerning the advances made to him by the IRC._

 

David that sounds great and I'm so happy for you. America has always been

I sometimes wondered if you were still unhappy but I still can't sleep and thinking that you too would be

 

 

* * *

 

 

_8th May 2015_

_On writing-paper, sealed in an unaddressed envelope._

 

Dear David,

Sorry.

If you wanted then perhaps

 

 

* * *

 

 

_11th May 2015_

_Unsent text message._

 

David,

I saw you on the BBC.

Whatever.

You're still skinny. Eat.

 

 

* * *

 

_17th May 2015_

_On the back of a postcard depicting the Ibizan Old Town. Intended recipient unspecified._

 

I still want to see you again sometimes so badly I think I'm going to die. And I've never

 

 

* * *

 

 

_28th June 2015_

_Sent to my uncle by Mum nine days before Dad died. She sent it, she says, after finally realising that he never would._

 

Dear David, I went to the doctor for sleeping pills. She ran tests and said it 'would be unwise'.

Apparently 'would be unwise' is a euphemism for the heart problems that Dad died of. She says they’re quite advanced now. I can expect ten years at best.

So anyway if the best doesn't happen and I don't get the chance to say it aloud please know I always

Or at least, if it comes before the boys are grown up, you should forget me and try to love them and watch over them. I worry about Sam most, because he never really

And because he looks so much like you, I suppose, which

You don't want to know about all this, I imagine, only that

But it hurts so much that at night or when I see you look so thin I– anyway. I always. That's it.

I just never managed to stop.

 

 

 

 


End file.
